"Based on empirical data gathered over the first few months of study," stated prominent MIT mathematician Dr. Ken Hoffman,"we just assumed that the dirty glass had to sit in the sink at least a day or two before being transfered to the dishwasher. We didn't understand why this was necessary at the time, we just assumed the study subjects knew something we didn't."
Researchers noted that a dirty glass would often be left in the sink, on the counter, or on a nearby table by one roommate, only to be transfered to the dishwasher days later by another roommate entirely. The dish may sit out hours, 1 day, or even a week. Sometimes large quantities would be left unattended, sometimes only a solitary glass..
"These findings left us stymied." stated Dr. Wai-Yim Ching, professor of physics at UMKC. "There seemed to be simply no correlation between the amount of dishes left out or how long they were left out. At that time, we formulated a few hypothesis, isolated a few variables, and set up a few parallel studies. We wanted answers."
The data released today shocked the scientific community, and has many leading minds in the field calling for answers.
Dr. Hoffman reported. "It turns out there was no reason to leave the dishes sitting around before putting them in the washer. This was not a necessary step in the cleaning process." Amid jeers and frantic shouting from the press, Hoffman concluded, "It turns out some of the roommates at Chateaus Bitchin' are simply, well, fucking lazy."
After trying to reach members of Chateaus Bitchin' for comment, members of the press were only able extract partial answers from a cleaning crew that enters the domicile twice weekly. "Peligroso!!!" cried one member of the cleaning crew. "No entrar! Que horror!!"
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