Premable

"Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules."
-Walter Sobchak (The Big Lebowski)

Rules indeed. We must all live by rules. Rules separate us from the animals. Without them, society breaks down and civilization grinds to a halt. The rules we live by ensure the food you eat and the streets you walk are safe. It is in the spirit of rules that I introduce to you a series of many (many, so many) parts entitled:

Fear and Loathing in the Pharmacy: Chasing the Apothecary Dream.

After considering many ways to literate my daily grievances concerning pharmacy life, I've decided to post a series of articles outlining basic pharmacy etiquette. Rules of proper pharmacy behavior, if you will. No longer will I merely gripe about blunders of people that come into my little drug shoppe. I'm going to explain (in excruciating detail) what you are doing wrong, and how you can mend your boorish ways. By following these very simple and straightforward practices you can guarantee that your pharmacist will not hate you. They may even begin to like you.

Expect the first rule soon. I've already picked up many ideas like so much cannon fodder.

A little tidbit from today:

A Mom calls me. Mothers are ever so concerned about their children's welfare.

Mom: My son has ringworm. I want to know if a medication we picked up in Mexico can be used to treat it (she pronounces the name of the mexi-med, which I don't remember and don't much care to).
Me: Umm... That's a Mexican trade name that I don't know. Does it say anywhere on it what the ingredients are?
Mom: Uhh... Oh! Here it is. T-E-R-B-I-N-A...
Me(cutting her off, because I'm busy and don't feel like listening to a 5 minute spelling contest): That's terbinafine, the generic name for Lamisil, an antifungal, used to treat fungal infections.
Mom: Oh, so it's Lamisil? We can use it then, right?
Me: Where is the ringworm? How large is it?
Mom: It's by his eye, about the size of a quarter.
Me(pause): Does your son value his vision?

I hadn't meant to say that it. It just came out. Sometimes I cut to the chase to try and put things in perspective for people. Especially when they're going to put mexi-med on their son's face adjacent to a valuable part of the body such as the eye.